The Secret
by Well Groomed Goldfish
Summary: What if people found out about the Nations?
1. Chapter 1

**Not much to say. I felt like writing just a fun fic, but knowing me, this'll turn out a lot more serious than it started. oh well. Characters aren't mine. -3- Hopefully, this will be my first fic with no OC's but i have no idea where i'm going with this, so who knos. **

**Ch. 1**

* * *

"Fuck"

This wasn't supposed to happen. This was never supposed to happen. This was supposed to be a secret, kept from the world, and only revealed to a select few.

So how had it gotten out?

Alfred bolted the door after slamming it shut and ran into his study. He came back a few seconds later with his mahogany desk and barricaded the door with it.

"How did they find out!?" Matthew was standing in the hallway, next to Arthur. His violet eyes were widened in confusion, and he clutched his bear tightly to his chest.

"I dunno" Alfred growled, rushing to the backdoor to lock and barricade it as well, "You better board up the windows. I know my media well enough, and lemme tell you; this is gonna be like that zombie scene from Residence Evil. You know the one where you're locked in the house and hafta shoot those zombies? Problem is, we can't shoot 'em this time."

"And why the bloody hell not?" Arthur growled irritably, "Isn't what they're doing illegal? Isn't this private property?"

"Umm…Artie" Alfred frowned, "Technically, no. The government pays to maintain this place through tax money, so technically, it's government-owned. Public property."

"But how did they find out?!" Francis asked peering out the window at the thronging crowd of photographers and newsmen that raged outside Alfred's house. The nations had been at Alfred's place for a small get-together after their latest meeting. Almost everyone was there (or everyone that wasn't completely furious at Alfred) and they had just been sitting, talking and relaxing when Arthur decided to check the news

_..thank you Diana. Well, I'm here today outside what is said to be one Mr. Alfred F. Jones' house. As you previously heard from Diana, Mr. Jones is believed to be the personification of our nation, The United States of America. How such-"_

Arthur had turned off the TV just as a loud knocking came from Alfred's front door. The nations looked at each other for a few seconds, allowing the shock of what they had just heard to sink in before Alfred sprung up and locked the door, leaving them in their current predicament.

"Do you think they know about us?" Ludwig asked, looking worried, "The rest of the nations?"

Alfred shrugged, "I don't know…why don't you turn on the news again, Artie?"

Arthur, tight-lipped and pale, nodded and rushed back into the living room, followed by the majority of the nations, just as Alfred's phones rang.

The young nation rushed into the kitchen and grabbed the phone, "Hello?"

"Hello, is this Mr. Jones? This is Bob Barker from CNN-"

Alfred hung up the phone, only to have it ring again, "Hello?"

"Hello, this is Diana Smith from ABC Ne-"

Again, Alfred slammed the phone down, just as it rang again, "Hello?"

"Hello. This is Tom Williams from Fox-"

Alfred threw the phone on the floor, glaring at the machine as it started to ring again _Last time_ he promised to himself as he reached towards the device _If this is some news guy again, I'm unplugging the damn thing…_

"Hello?" Alfred said, holding up the phone to his ear, "And if you're some news guy, don't even bother saying anything. I'm not Jones, he's…battling a grizzly bear. With his bare hands. And he's winning, of course. Ahaha! Take that you damn bear!" Alfred held the phone away from his head for a few seconds, grabbing some pots that stood close by and throwing them to the floor before letting out what he assumed to be a perfect imitation of a bear growl.

"A grizzly bear Alfred? Couldn't you think of something a bit more normal? Like how about in the bathroom?"

"Boss!" Alfred cried out in a mixture of surprised and relief, "Boss, have you seen the news!? How the hell did that get out!?"

"I don't know Alfred" the man admitted, sounding rather weary, "But I'm currently trying to figure out what to everyone concerning you."

"Well? What are you going to tell them?"

The man sighed, "Look Alfred. We'll see what evidence they have…and then we might just have to tell the truth."

"But…"

"I know Alfred. I'll try to find a way to deny it…Lord knows I hate lying to my people, but if it's to keep you safe…But at this point, I don't know if it's exactly possible…"

"What about the others?" Alfred asked, chewing on his bottom lip, "Do they know about them?"

"From what I've heard, not exactly…do they know that personifications of nations actually exist now? Yes, it seems like it. Do they know exactly who the personifications are? For some, yes. For others, no."

"What are some of the others they know!?"

"They know the entire G8, excluding the EU. Beyond that, I don't think they know anyone."

"The G8…" Alfred muttered, looking worriedly into the room next door, "Ok…Boss, what are we gonna do?"

"For now Alfred, stay put. Where are you?"

"I'm at my place."

"Ok…ok, just stay there for now. We'll send choppers over soon and move you to a safer location."

"Uh Boss…" Alfred said, hesitantly, "There's one tiny problem."

"And what's that?"

"Well, a chopper can hold, what? Four people?"

"Give or take. But there's only one of you and two operative pilots."

"I'm not the only one here."

"What?!" the President sounded shocked, "Well, who else is there with you?"

"Umm…Iggy, Mattie, Francis, Jack, Kiku, Ivan, Ludwig, Gilbert, Liza, Roderich, Wang Yao, Feliciano, Lovino, Antonio, Katyusha, Mathais, Feliks, Vash, Toris, Natayla, Berwald, Tino, Heracules, Sadiq, Eduard, Ravis, Cheylle-"

"Why are they all at your house!?" the President asked brusquely, cutting his nation off.

Alfred winced at his Boss's tone, "Umm…well, we decided to have a little get-together after the meeting, and since my place is the biggest…"

"Which house are you at, exactly?"

"My plantation home, down in Virginia."

"Ok." The man on the other end sucked in a breath of air and let it out, "How many of there are you?"

"Um…give or take…" Alfred paused a second, counting on his fingers, "Fifty-ish."

"You have _Fifty_ nations at your house, and you have your goddamn media outside."

"Umm…yea."

The President let out a low stream of obscenities. "Ok." He said, pausing momentarily, "Ok…we'll send some planes over. You can get to the roof, right? I'll call you on your cell, and when I do, get everyone onto the roof…Try not to let the nations that haven't already been identified been seen. And barricade everything, alright?"

"Already did boss."

"Ok" the President responded, "Look Alfred, just…hang in there, ok?"

Alfred smiled and nodded, "I'll be fine."

"Bye. I've got to face those fucking reporters now…buzzards, the whole lot of them."

"Sorry Boss."

"Ah, It's not your fault. When I find out whose fault it is exactly…" the man trailed off, leaving an unspoken threat hanging.

"We'll all be behind you on that one" Alfred said, smiling.

"Yea..ok, I really have to go now. Bye."

"Bye"

The President hung up, and Alfred paused, running a hand over his face before he too hung up. Unplugging the phone, he headed towards the living room where the majority of the nations had converged around the TV.

"Why are we watching BBC?" Alfred asked as he walked into the room.

"Because I have the bloody remote." Arthur responded tersely, "Now shut it."

"We should watch the news…"

"This _is _the news."

"American news."

Arthur glared at Alfred, ripping his eyes from the television, "Fine" he spat, "What channel do you go for your news?"

"The Daily Show. Or the Colbert Report. Usually both."

"Those are _comedians_."

Alfred shrugged, "Works for me. Anyways. I've already figured out which ones of us the People know about, and which ones they don't."

The entire room stiffened and turned their attention towards Alfred. Arthur even turned off the TV and glared at the younger nation expectantly, "Well?" he snapped.

"The G8" Alfred responded, "They only know the identities of the G8."

Arthur and the various other members of the G8 let out a moan (except Russia, who's insane grin only seemed to stretch further) while the others let out a collective breath they had been holding in.

"Now." Alfred said, "My boss said he'd get us out of here. He's sending planes over, so we're going to need to go on the roof t-"

A loud crash suddenly interrupted Alfred, and the young nation looked up, startled, "What…it came from the basement…"

"FUCKING BASTARDS WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?!"

"Tony!" Alfred sprinted out of the room, towards the basement.

"Tony?" Toris looked over at Arthur, the question evident in his eyes.

"Al's alien" Arthur responded, disdainfully, "Nasty little bugger, really…"

There were more crashes, and then the sound of human voices…plural. Alfred wasn't alone in the basement. The nations looked wildly at each other, but before they could act, the screams grew louder.

"MR. JONES-"

"JUST A WORD-"

"IS IT TRUE-"

"FUCK YOU CRAZY BASTARD _GET OFF OF ME!_"

There were crashes, the sound of footsteps, more cursing…

"TONY! NO! BAD TONY! YOU CAN'T STUN THEM!"

More crashes…

"YOU CAN'T KILL THEM EITHER!!! HOW IS THAT BETTER THAN STUNNING THEM!?!?"

"MR. JONES WHY DO YOU-"

"IS THAT AN-"

"FUCK TONY!!! NO STUNNING, KILLING, USING THEM AS PETS, USING THEM AS LAB ANIMALS, NOTHING THAT COULD POTENTIALLY HARM THEM! AND THAT INCLUDES BRAIN PROBES!"

"Fuck, eh." Matthew breathed, "They got into the damn basement."

"What do we do!?" Cheylle looked around, the worry evident in her face, "We can't let them see us…"

"We hide." Arthur had already stood up, "Now. Let's go."

The nations made their mad dash to the doorway just as Alfred reached said doorway, followed by a swarm of rapid reporters. There was a pause, as everyone stared at each other.

Then all hell broke loose.

* * *

**Notes: So...the President (Al's boss) in this fic isn't obama. i really really really don't liek him, and last thing i wanted to do was get politically bitchy in a fic that was just supposed to be for fun. and i knew that would happen if i included him, so, i just solved the problem by taking him out! i have no idea where i'm going to go with this...oh well. **

**AND YES. ALFRED GETS HIS NEWS FROM THE DAILY SHOW AND THE COLBERT REPORT. at first i was actually going to have alfred list a new station, but they all have hella bias (i watch BBC or listen to NPR, personally) and again, i wanted to stay away from shit liek that in this fic. **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/n: Sorry this took so long to come out! ;A; I've finally decided which college I'm going to~(hella pshyced!) so, i've been hella busy...plus i started another fic. -3- **

**Please Enjoy...ahh...poor alfred. **

**Ch. 2: The Bosses**

* * *

There are certain things in the world that were not meant to be touched by mankind. Taboo objects that humans are not meant to ever lay their hands on. The Forbidden Fruit. Pandora's Box. When such objects are touched, it can only lead to suffering, not only of the one who touched it, but to all of mankind.

Ivan Braginski's scarf was one such object.

In retrospect, Alfred supposed he should have expected it. With such mass chaos, something was bound to go wrong. However, at the time, he had been too busy; wrangling with reporters and disobedient aliens alike. Many of the nations had fled to various parts of the house. Others, not so fortunate, had been cornered by the media, surrounded by screaming newsmen and flashing cameras. Ludwig was shielding Feliciano while Arthur was cursing at a particularly obstinate group of photographers. Lovino was using Antonio as a shield, Wang Yao and Kiku just seemed to have frozen up, and Francis had taken to flirting with a very pretty photographer. Gilbert and Peter seemed to be faring rather well, yelling back at the newsmen and posing for the photographers.

"FUCK OFF AND GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!" Alfred yelled, pushing past another group of photographers. Looking wildly for an exit, he saw it.

One of the newsmen surrounding Ivan had reached out and grabbed the long scarf Ivan wore, tugging sharply on it.

Grabbing a rifle the rifle that sat on his mantle, Alfred rushed forward, just as Ivan swung around, whipping his pipe out and bringing it down on the unsuspecting reporter's head with superhuman speed. There was a loud THUNK! as metal met wood. Alfred had reached the group just in time, shoving the reporter out of the way and bringing up the rifle to meet the incoming pipe. Grunting, he pushed back at Ivan, sending the larger country stumbling slightly backwards before twirling the gun around and sending a warning shot right by the larger nation's head.

So perhaps the gunshot was overkill, but Alfred had been desperate, trying to make sure that Ivan got the message to _stay away_. Apparently though, he didn't. Readjusting his grip on his pipe, Ivan lunged at Alfred, knocking him onto the ground. Soon, the two former superpowers were wrestling on the floor as excited photographers crowded around them, cameras flashing.

"Get off of Brother!" Natayla had run forward, brandishing one of her knives. She approached the two fighting nations, and watched intently for an opening.

"Don't try to get involved!" Arthur rushed over, grabbing Natayla's wrist, forcing her to drop the knife, "Try to separate them, not-arrgh!"

Natayla had reached into her dress and pulled out another knife with her other hand. As Arthur talked, she had slashed at him, cutting across his face. Arthur had seen the attack coming and had managed to evade it for the most part, but she had managed to get a shallow cut across his right cheek. He released her and jumped back, pulling out a handgun as he did so, "You crazy bitch!" he yelled, "I'm trying to break up the fight, and you're just-!"

Again, Natayla cut him off, attacking him, "No." she corrected, as Arthur parried the blade with his gun, "You were trying to interfere on America's behalf. You were fighting against Brother."

As Natayla brought the blade down on Arthur's gun again, it fired, burying itself into the wall. Unfortunately, Arthur had no control over where the bullet had gone, and as such, it had pinned that one strange curl of Feliciano into the wall. The Italian collapsed, shaking and tearing up, "Feiliciano!" Ludwig cried, catching him as he fell, "Feliciano, are you alright!?"

Lovino, who had seen the whole thing, turned angrily at Arthur, who was still struggling with Natayla, too preoccupied with keeping her blade from his throat to notice what had happened to his bullet, "You bastard!" Lovino yelled, charging at Arthur, "You perverted old man!"

Antonio, noticing his precious Lovino charging towards the fray, and moreover, charging at Arthur, decided to also join in, "This is for my armada!!!" he yelled, pulling out a large battle-axe seemingly out of nowhere.

"THAT WAS AGES AGO!!! GET OVER IT!!!" Arthur yelled, simultaneously trying to dodge Natayla's knife, Lovino's blows, and Antonio's axe. He had just managed to dodge a blow from Natayla when Antonio's axe came swinging down again. _Bloody hell…I'm not going to be able to dodge that…_

Arthur braced himself for the impact…but it never came. Looking up, he was somewhat surprised to see the axe, blocked by…was that a hockey stick?

"Ahh…hey Arthur"

"Matthew" Arthur nodded curtly, "Thanks for the save"

"No problem…but can't we all stop fighting an just tal-hey!" Antonio, removing his axe from Matthew's hockey stick brought it swinging back down again. Matthew blocked it with his hockey stick, and soon the two nations were engaged in a fight, with Antonio on the offensive, and poor Matthew trying to reason with him. Francis, seeing his precious former colony threatened, jumped into the battle, but really proved more worthless than anything. Kiku, seeing an opportunity to injure Ivan on Alfred's behalf soon also joined in the fray. Wang Yao, unsure which side to take, stood on the sidelines, watching the fight with a small frown. However, when Im Yong Soo tackled him, sending him flying into the middle of the main fight between Alfred and Ivan, the Asian nation really had no choice. A three-way battle was going on between the three main world powers and the rest of Europe and Canada engaged in a fight (as soon as Antonio, Francis, and Arthur had started battling, the rest of Europe soon joined in, seeing it as an opportunity to settle old scores. Gilbert was screaming something about regaining lost land and becoming a country again…but it was lost over the din) Soon, the only nations that were not caught in battle were Feliciano, who still was trembling by the wall, and Sealand, who had tried to get into the fight, but was soon kicked out by Arthur.

The media was ecstatic. Fights always sold, and an all-out brawl between the nations of the world was bound to sell out. Photographers rushed about with cameras, snapping photo after photo of the nations.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE!?!?!"

A voice, somehow carrying over the ruckus caused almost everyone to look up. Surrounded by about thirty or so secret service men, the President of the United States had appeared, his face colored a dark shade of red and his expression furious. The nations looked at each other uncomfortably. Several dropped their weapons, and several more removed their hands from their enemies' necks, save Francis who removed his hand from Arthur's pants. Silence fell over the nations, except for the grunts and cries coming from the fight that still raged between Alfred, Wang Yao, and Ivan.

"Break those idiots up" the President ordered, gesturing to the three on the floor. The servicemen nodded, and a group of twenty of them surrounded the three fighting nations, pulling them apart even as they kicked and struggled to get back into the fight.

"Alfred F. Jones. You. Are. In. So. Much. Trouble"

Perhaps the sight of his Boss's near-purpled face only inches away from his own was what finally calmed Alfred down, for almost immediately, he stopped struggling. Wang Yao, being an unwilling participant in the fight in the first place stopped struggling as soon as he was extracted from it, and Ivan, seeing Alfred getting yelled at by his boss also stopped, smiling cheerfully down at the servicemen who held him.

Alfred smiled nervously, wincing in pain as he did so. He couldn't see very well, as Texas had been knocked from his face early on in the fight, and a large bruise was probably swelling on his upper lip. Ivan and Wang Yao had managed to get in a few good blows, but he had also managed to hurt them quite badly. Ivan was sporting a large black eye, and the rest of his injuries were effectively hidden under the large coat he wore. Wang Yao had a shallow cut across his cheek, and was glaring at Im Yong Soo who was trying to hide behind Kiku.

"Everyone. Get out of here." The President said, glaring at the newsmen. They nodded, and made a mad scramble for the door, leaving the nations , the President, and the Secret Service men alone in an uncomfortable silence. "Your respective bosses will be arriving soon" the President growled, "And I do not think they are particularly pleased with you. As for you" he said, glaring at Alfred, who seemed to shrink back slightly, "You are coming with me."

The President grabbed Alfred's ear, and as a mother would dragged him into the next room, the young nation protesting the entire way, "Wasn't my fault! OW! Stop it! That commie-OWW! OK!"

The nations shifted uncomfortably as the door slammed behind the President and Alfred and screams started coming from the room.

"-THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING!! YOU'RE A NATION! NOT A FIVE-YEAR OLD!!!"

"I.."

"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT!!! ARE YOU CRAZY?!"

As the yelling continued, several of the nations looked at each other, worry evident on their face. Getting yelled at by one's boss was never very fun, and many knew that they were soon going to be in Alfred's position.

* * *

"Absolutely splendid. This is wonderful. Just great."

"Boss…"

"I don't want to hear it."

"I…"

"I said, I don't want to hear it."

Alfred shifted looking over at Arthur, who sat next to him, with an equally uncomfortable expression on his face. They were still at Alfred's house, with part of America's army standing guard outside. The bosses had arrived a couple of hours ago, and had dragged their respective nations to various parts of the house to yell at them. Alfred, Arthur, Matthew and Francis had been kept in the same room, and were now staring up at their bosses, guilty expressions on their faces.

"Now. Please. Explain what the fuck happened," Alfred's boss said, his furious expression never leaving his face.

Alfred swallowed, "Well…I kinda forgot to board up the basement…and the media came in through there…it was really chaotic, and whatnot, and one of the newsmen grabbed Ivan's scarf…so I grabbed my gun."

"You grabbed your gun because someone touched Russia's scarf!?" the President sounded shocked, "Why would you do that!? Isn't that overreacting a bit?"

Alfred stared at his boss, "This is _Ivan Braginski_ we are talking about. _You do not touch that scarf_. Ivan would have killed that newsman, and last thing I wanted was to have Russia kill an American citizen."

"Ok. Fine" the President shook his head, "I'm sorry. Please continue."

Alfred nodded and began speaking again, "So, I grabbed my gun, and used it to absorb the blow. I then pushed Ivan back, and fired a shot by his head…he freaked out, attacked me, and then we started fighting. After that, I suppose everyone else got dragged in."

"I see…" the President sighed, "Well that's wonderful…but we're going to have to do something about this." He threw a copy of _The New York Times_ in front of Alfred. On the front, in emblazoned letters, the words, "COLD WAR II: POSSIBLE WORLD WAR?" glared back at Alfred, and right under, a picture of Alfred , Ivan and Wang Yao with their fists in each other's faces. Alfred winced, and his boss took the paper from him. "That's not all" he growled, "Look."

He threw the paper open, and almost on every page was a photograph of the nations. Arthur was strangling Francis ("I thought you were on the same side" Alfred muttered. "We were" responded Arthur), Matthew still trying to ward off Antonio's axe, Liza smashing Gilbert in the face with her frying pan, Mathais grinning madly as he swung his axe around….the pictures went on and on.

"What are we supposed to do about this?" the President growled, "Half the world is in complete panic. They're confident we're all going to world war, not that a bunch of stupid nations decided to get in a godforsaken brawl!"

"Do they know the identities of all the nations now?" Matthew asked, looking at his boss, his purple eyes overflowing with worry.

The Prime Minister of Canada glared at his nation for a few seconds, before the expression gave way to a rather gentle smile, "Are you worried? Yes. Unfortunately, the reporters were able to piece together the puzzle, and they know the identities of all the nations, at least all the nations that were at Alfred's house that night…"

Canada nodded, looking down and clutching his bear closer to his chest.

"Freaking Mattie" Alfred muttered, glaring at his brother. Nobody was ever able to stay angry at Matthew long (mostly because they forgot about him) but even his boss seemed ready to forgive him! As for his own boss…Alfred glanced over. The man was still red-faced, his brow knitted in anger, his expression dark. Yea. That would take a while to fix.

* * *

**So, since the american president isn't obama, i don't kno who the other presidents would be...just chosed your fav. leader of that country and make 'em the boss! :D I'm just using the stereotypical President and whatnot..**

**Reviews are always love!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So this hasn't been updated in forever. Yea. About that. I fell out of the Hetalia fandom for a while but I was feeling nostalgic so I was looking back over this and remembered this story and suddenly I felt like finishing it so yea here's to a second attempt. Also I really hate abandoned fics so I felt really guilty for just leaving this. That said, I really didn't like where the original story was going (part of the main reason I dropped it) so I decided to try a different route with this one. It will probably get more serious as the story goes on though, knowing me. **

* * *

"Community service."

"Your fault for messing up."

Alfred groaned, collapsing onto the chair and looking at the papers his boss had pushed towards him. It had been nearly a week since the brawl at his house and in that period Alfred had taken refuge in the White House, with heavy security constantly surrounding him. Though he had hardly been outside in the last week, he could constantly hear and catch glimpses of the massive crowd that had camped outside the White House.

From what Alfred understood though, none of the other Nations seemed to be faring any better; while he had not talked to anyone since leaving his home in Virginia, he had seen the news reports and it looked like the others were also attempting to avoid their media. There were throngs of reporters and concerned citizens alike camping outside the capitals of the world, hoping the catch a glimpse or speak to their respective personifications.

"Okay, fine" Alfred said, gritting his teeth, "Community service, I can take that but what the FUCK is this provision?" he asked, glaring at his boss and pointing to the document. They were in the Oval Office, discussing how the remedy Alfred's reputation with the public after the brawl. The general public had calmed down after the world leaders assured them that a third world war was in fact _not_ looming on the horizon but the personifications of the nations themselves had been harshly criticized by the media for their behavior.

"Like I said" Alfred's boss said calmly, surveying his country as a mother might an unruly child, "It's a way to ensure that your public image is restored."

"I got that" Alfred said, "I get the whole save some orphans so they love me again but _what is this provision about me having to work with one Ivan Braginski_?"

"It's exactly what it sounds like" the President said, "Since you two decided to, so _brilliantly_, brawl on the floor in the middle of everything we have to prove to the world that you two actually get along wonderfully, no hard feelings from the Cold War. So, you've both been signed up to help with projects around the world to firstly, prove that Alfred F. Jones is a good person who cares and secondly, that America and Russia do not commonly fall into fist fights."

"But we do."

"And the world doesn't need to know that" the President said, rolling his eyes, "Look, Alfred we've got to get you back out there. The public's already furious that we've kept you locked up for the last week-"

"They're not the only ones" Alfred grumbled.

"But we have to make sure your image is intact" the President finished, ignoring Alfred, "Look, Alfred I'm sorry. I really am." His faces softened and he reached across the table, putting a hand on Alfred's arm, "I really am sorry that it's come to this. But please, _please_ cooperate."

"Why can't I do this with someone else?" Alfred asked, looking aside, "Like…like Mattie. Or Arthur. Or hell, even Kiku yea that'd work!"

"Because you did not get into a brawl with those nations" the President responded, "Alfred, this is the best way to get your image back. Just be charming, likable and _get along with Russia_."

"Well what about China?" Alfred said, "China was also involved!"

"Yes but all accounts say China was pushed into the fight by another nation, whose identity still remains unknown" the President said, "So really, the world sees him as an innocent victim in all of this. No, it was just you and Russia duking it out on the ground as far as anyone's concerned. And really, it's not that bad. All the others are taking similar actions, based on which terrible pictures of them got out. I believe France and England are working together, as well as the Nordics, Hungary and Germany, namely because of her fight with Germany's brother, China is working with Japan…the list goes on and on you see."

Alfred slumped further into his seat, "I'm not getting out of this one am I?" he muttered.

"Nope" his President said cheerfully, "Glad you figured that out so fast because you have a press conference with Russia in three hours to announce your joint projects."

"Three hours!?" Alfred cried, sitting upright instantly, "Why so soon? Why'd you wait so long to tell me about this!?"

"We just got the details worked out, Alfred" the President said, sighing heavily, "You know how messed up your politics are. I told you as soon as I figured everything out…unfortunately your dear founders did not find it necessary to include an amendment concerning one Alfred F. Jones in the Constitution so we also had to figure out exactly how to work with you. In short, it was a mess."

"I'd imagine" Alfred said, smiling wryly, "this is awful though" he moaned, "I just hope I make it out of this alive."

"You know I feel the same" the President said, "Now, you probably want to clean up a bit. The public's going to speak to Mr. Alfred F. Jones for the first time and we want to make a good impression."

* * *

The room was horribly crowded, Alfred noted with a slight squirming in his stomach. He was sitting on a small stage, with his President standing behind a podium to his right and Ivan to his left. To Ivan's left stood Ivan's president, behind a podium as well. The two nations had said nothing to each other upon arrival and instead had opted to completely ignore each other, Alfred trying to maintain his cheerful grin and Ivan smiling pleasantly out at the crowd.

"…and so, to further prove the dedication our nations have, not only towards cooperation with each other but towards the improvement of communities throughout the globe, we are proud to announce a joint collaboration effort between Russia and the United States involved both Mr. Ivan Braginski and Mr. Alfred F. Jones where they will personally volunteer their services to help those in need." The President had finished speaking and nodded to the crowd, who politely clapped.

Russia's boss also clapped politely, nodding his head in approval, "We too would like to see a strong relationship grow between the United States and Russia…" he began his own speech and Alfred promptly tuned him out, his eyes scanning the crowd. He never liked reporters. Too often had he seen good men and women villainized by a small twist of their words. The idea that that kind of discretion would now be directed towards him made Alfred unhappy, but at the same time he hoped that at least the American news stations would show him some mercy.

"…and that is why we too have taken part in this project, to help not only our foreign relations but also communities throughout the globe." The Russian President finished speaking and smiled at the crowd as more polite applause rose from the audience, "Now, if anyone has any questions, we would be glad to take them…"

Instantly, everyone in the room jumped up and began speaking at the same time. Alfred glanced quickly over at Ivan and felt a small surge of relief upon realizing that the usual creepy grin he wore had been replaced by a small frown. So he wasn't the only one feeling nervous then.

There was some shouting by men in suits who stood beside the podiums and finally, the crowd was once again calmed down, "Please" said America's President, "One at a time."

A young male reporter, wearing a sharp suit and holding a small recorder was the first to ask a question, "This is directed to both Mr. Braginski and Mr. Jones." The reporter, Alfred noted, spoke with an American accent, "But could you please explain to us what exactly you are and how you came to be?"

"Ah…that's a good question." Alfred said before Ivan could speak, "Well we're Nations. Personification of Nations I suppose. As for how we came to be well I couldn't tell you that…I just remember being there. I don't remember being born or anything like that; I just remember waking up in the woods and wandering around, kinda lost really. I mean, I knew who I was and what was up but I didn't have the slightest clue as to how I got there."

"It is the same for me" Ivan nodded, speaking with his heavy accent, "We do not have memories of birth, just as you do not. We simply are. I remember waking up, somewhere dark and cold and wooded. I knew who I was instantly though I could not tell you why or how. How nations come to be, how we are born none of us could give you that answer."

The reporter nodded, sitting down. Another reporter, a young woman this time, stood up, also holding up a small recorder, "This question is also addressed to Mr. Braginski and Jones." She said, speaking with an Eastern European accent, though Alfred could not quite place it, "But how old are you?"

"Far older than I care to admit" Ivan smiled pleasantly, sending chills up Alfred spine, "I cannot say. I have died before, yes but I do not think that counts as a rebirth? No, it does not since I was the same-"

"You have died before?" the reporter asked, incredulous.

"Well of course" Ivan said, shrugging, "Many times. I have lost count at this point you see, but perhaps Mr. Jones could give you a number as he is far younger and has led a much more sheltered life…"

"I've had my fair share of deaths too" Alfred quickly responded, ignoring Ivan's smile, "Believe it or not, Mr. Braginski, I've been on the battlefield too."

"Ah yes, but the battlefield is the only place you have met with Death? Truly I envy such a luxurious existence!"

"Well just because _some_ nations have leaders that couldn't care less about their people."

Ivan calmly stared at Alfred, quirking an eyebrow up. Alfred could feel the chill radiating from the larger nation but continued to glare at him, determined not to back down, "Careful what you say, young one." Ivan said, his voice a deadly calm, "It is ill-advised to talk poorly of matters you do not fully understand."

"Don't you _dare_ talk down to me just because I'm younger than you, I'm just as capable as you, you co-"

"And that's all we have time for today" America's President said loudly, cutting Alfred off, "I'm sorry for the fact that we were only able to ask a few questions but these two need to head out and get to work!" he smiled at the news reporters who had jumped to their feet and were crying out in protest. The police officers held them back while the President all but screamed over the din, "I APPRECIATE EVERYONE FOR COMING OUT AND WISH YOU ALL A GOOD NIGHT."

With that, the President quickly ushered Alfred off the stage, followed by Ivan and his President.

"Well that was a near disaster" Alfred's President said, once Alfred, Ivan and Ivan's President had squeezed into the large black cars waiting for them outside the press conference, "Seriously Alfred? What were you thinking?"

"Yes" Ivan's President nodded in agreement, "You two must get along, come we must restore the world's faith that we are at peace!"

Ivan shrugged and said something in Russia, to which his boss quickly responded. Soon the two were lost in their own conversation, and Alfred's boss seemed too tired to yell at him so Alfred took to gloomily staring out the window. It seemed like things were getting worse and worse since the secret had been leaked and Alfred vowed to find out exactly who had done it, why, and make sure they suffered for it. Severely.

* * *

"So this is our first project" Alfred said, dumbly, looking at the small brick structure.

"If it makes you feel better, I did not advocate for you idiots to come here" the woman sitting next to Alfred and Ivan said in heavily accented English while glaring at the two nations who were uncomfortably wedged into the back of the smaller car, "I've had enough dealings caught between you two idiots and do not take any pleasure in being caught between you two again."

"Yea, thanks Maria" Alfred said, "We had a long flight and then were crammed into the back of this tiny car how about a "nice to see you Alfred"?"

"It isn't nice to see you"

"Ouch that stung. I thought we were friends." Alfred whined.

"And I don't care what you thought."

"How have things been with your people?" Ivan said abruptly, cutting into the conversation before Alfred could respond, "Have your people take kindly towards finding out that you were Colombia?"

Maria, the personification of Columbia laughed a deep and hearty sound. She was quite a beautiful young woman, with tanned skin, brown eyes and long dark hair that had been tied back into a ponytail that day. "Well because we had our own conference later that day, thankfully nobody from South or Central America was at Mr. Jones' house, remember?" Maria said, "So while I too have been having some…ah issues with people, I do not need to rebuild my image quite as badly. Now come, you must meet the children."

"This weather is quite different than what I am used to." Ivan said, as the three climbed out of the car and into a small throng of reporters. The police however, held them back and the three nations made their way up to the building, ignoring the shouts that came from the crowd and flashing from the cameras around them.

"Yea, well get used to it, looks like we might be here for a while" Alfred said, "And what's wrong? You're the one always talking about going somewhere warm. You're in Colombia. That not warm enough for you?"

"Oh my dear, stupid America" Ivan responded, sighing, "While I do enjoy warmer climates you must remember I am Russia. Now I understand you may not know where I am located on the map but I am situated very far north. When you move further away from the equator, temperature has a tendency to dro-"

"Shut it" Alfred snapped, "I know your lands are as frozen as your soul. So what? You know I get some pretty nasty temperatures too."

"Did it ever occur to you that perhaps I am not used to such heat and that such high temperatures may be somewhat difficult for me to adjust to?"

"Well that's why you're not wearing your commie coat." Alfred said, gesturing to the t-shirt and khakis Ivan wore, "But dude you are pale as _fuck_. Seriously I think I might go blind from looking at you."

"Oh stop it you two" Maria interrupted them, tossing a quick glare over her shoulder, "Isn't the whole point of this that you two are supposed to be getting along?"

They had reached the front of the brick building and Maria opened the door leading Alfred and Ivan into the building, "It is not air conditioned" Ivan noted, looking somewhat unhappy.

"Well of course it is not." Maria responded, "It has been rather cool this year and we are in my poorer districts. Now come on, follow me."

They walked a short distance down a hallway and soon entered a rather spacious room. A blackboard stood on the wall and several adults and children sitting at desks were staring at the three that entered.

"Hello" Maria said, in Spanish, smiling at the group of rather dumbstruck people. Instantly they grinned back, the connection between themselves and their nation too strong for them to stay uncomfortable around her, "I bring you two rather distinguished individuals, Mr. Alfred Jones from the United States" Alfred grinned broadly and saluted the group, "and Mr. Ivan Braginski from Russia" Ivan smiled pleasantly and nodded, "These two men will be acting as teachers in this wonderful school for the next few months. They are doing volunteer work for their respective countries and have decided to come visit our wonderful country to teach in an elementary school of ours! I hope you treat them with the respect they deserve and show how fantastic the Colombian people are!"

The students and adults alike nodded enthusiastically, smiling at the three Nations. Maria, comfortable around her people, walked over the group of adults, whom Alfred assumed to be the teachers and began speaking to them in Spanish, gesturing towards Ivan and Alfred as she spoke.

"Teaching" Alfred said, softly to Ivan and mindful of the man pairs of eyes upon him, "Our bosses sure love us."

"Speak for yourself but I find children rather relaxing" Ivan said, smiling at the children, who were smiling, somewhat hesitantly, back.

"Can you even speak Spanish?" Alfred asked, frowning.

"Most nations can speak every language, Alfred" Ivan responded coolly, "Is that a serious question? I do have to deal with international relations you know and a language barrier is a poor excuse to not deal with a country. It's one of my weaker languages but yes I can speak it."

"Just asking" Alfred shrugged, "Wonder what subjects we're gonna be assigned to…"

"Well it seems like the best way to make this work is you're each going to be assigned a group of students." Maria interrupted their conversation, startling Alfred, who had not heard her coming back, "You will both be given the curriculum and monitored by one of the actual teachers here. You will start tomorrow. Any questions? None? Good. Also, I will be stopping by to ensure you have not killed my people or burned the place to the ground because may god have mercy on your souls if you mess up. Now I'll show you to where you'll be staying for the duration of your stay here. Say good bye to the children."

Alfred and Ivan both quickly waved at the children and teachers before turning and following Maria out of the school.

* * *

**A/N: So yea going a COMPLETELY different direction. Again I'm not entirely sure where that direction's going to end up but I'll get somewhere. Hopefully. Also, while there is going to be a lot of interaction between Russia and America I do not anticipate their relationship getting romantic at all. I really do love them playing off of each other but idk about romance.**


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